I don't understand why he doesn't get a divorce? What does the military have to do with anything? If he's still legally married, it doesn't matter WHAT it says military-wise. There's still the whole thing on marital property.
Edit - I'm on schazjmd's side. He's a polygamist if he's married to TWO people. Are you legally married, or just living together?
PS Do you remember the situation with the supposed former girlfriend of James Brown? When he died, she tried to get money, but they said there was no proof that she was his wife. Like Pickles said, run like the dickens!My military husband has an existing marriage before we get married. Im hopeless, what will I do?
If his marriage to his first wife has not been legally terminated (divorce or annulment), than in the eyes of the military he is not a single man and is, in fact, breaking the rules of the UCMG which expressly forbid adultery. He has also broken state and federal laws if he married you as well..known as bigamy...and could go to jail for it. If you have been recieving health care, living in base housing or using other military benefits, he could also be charged with government fraud, possibly face jail time and be dishonorably discharged.
His wife has the right to come back and demand her rights to services from the military at any time. If she chooses to file for divorce, the military will automatically subtract any support the court awards her from his pay each month...he does not need to agree to it, the military will side with the courts. She could at any time file a complaint against him with the military for cheating and/or being a bigamist. Basically, she holds a lot of power and leverage.
I understand you love your husband. However, he has lied to you and put you in a tenuous (at best) position. In the eyes of the military, you have no rights and if he is caught and punished, you will be out on the streets, with a long court battle the only way to try and get any sort of financial support. He can not acknowledge you as his legal wife..in the eyes of the military, government or any legal system...period. He is continuing to lie. While it may be hard to hear, the best thing for you to do is pack up and leave. You may not be the only one he is telling these lies to. In any case, you need to protect yourself legally as well as emotionally. If you continue to collect military benefits, knowing it is illegal, you can be charge with fraud and as an accessory to his crimes as well, with a chance of being sentenced to time in a federal penetentiary.
The status of marriage is conferred by civil authorities, not military. The military merely recognizes the civil status and grants specific privileges to the spouse.
He needs to get divorced before you can legally marry him.
(And he better do it before the military discovers he's a polygamist.)
If he married you without obtaining a legal divorce from his first wife he has committed the crime of BIGAMY.
This is a serious crime and he can be arrested.
Also it does not give you any legal grounds to any of his possessions as in the eyes of the law you are not recognized as being legally married.
I suggest you consult a solicitor fast.
the military will assume the first wife is the legal spouse without a divorce. you would NOT be eligible for ANY military benefits( ID card, Medical, dental, etc). he can choose tol ist anyone he darn well pleases as the beneficiary of his life insurance policy and the TSP funds.
he cannot get married to you until he is legally divorced from his first wife. period. without a divorce decree, he cannot get remarried. therefore, you cannot get a marriage certificate. you absolutely MUST have that to be entered into the military's database.
if he LIED to the militray and told them he wasn't married, he committed fraudulent enlistment and could be dishonorably discharged.
what else has he lied to you about?
Call his commander and tell him that your husband (assuming you're legally married to him) is also married to someone else. He'll get it all straightened out.
If you're not legally married, just tell his commander that you're sleeping with him and he's married to someone else. Again, the commander will get it straightened out.
after x amount of years she is sntitled to a percentage of his pension if he stays in that long. I think he needs to get a divorce.
Married is married and until he gets divorced, he can't call you his legal wife without being a bigamist.
I have 1 comment for you: ';Joey m'; nailed it with his 2 last sentences. I second those 2....
He cannot declare you his ';common law'; spouse while he is still married. I am not sure how military law works, but in California, I could not change my benficiary without either the written and notarized consent of my wife, or a filed divorce decree. If he dies...she gets the cash if she is still his wife. What argument can you give in court against her...that you were his girlfriend, and he said you could have it. Better lean on his azz to get that divorce squared away.
If he doesn't have a finalize divorce decree from a civilian court, he is a bigamist and your marriage is not legal!
Seek legal counsel immediately.
If he is indeed unlawfully married to you he will face punishment in the military as well as civilian court.
Is his initials JEP? If so his ';First'; wife is really his second wife. He has another one in San Diego.
If none of this applies to you I am sorry, the story closely fits my ex.
He's a polygamist (married to more than one person at a time), which is illegal in America and he could go to jail for that.
He should seek a legal divorce from his first wife and hope that in the meanwhile some authorities (military or civilian) don't learn about his having broken the law.
Then, he should remarry you because your present marriage is illegal.
He can change the beneficiary on his military life insurance anytime to anyone he wishes. He doesn't have to wait for re-enlistment.
Your ';husband'; is a creep and you don't appear to be too bright either.
he is married, to her, legally, to her, to you its bigamy. and better get it straightened out quickly, im with the others on that! ya want that taken care of before the military finds out for sure! as far as i would be concerned, the beneficiary part would come second to the divorce... get the divorce first, thats most important, worry about the financial part next! if you love each other, get this stuff fixed! so the two of you can get married, LEGALLY!!!
If he is not legally divorced he is committing bigamy and she is the one that will benefit if something happens to him.Someone who's willing to marry without divorcing first is a big red flag ....Id Run Like Hell!
he is married....you cannot marry him before he gets divorced noone will recognize this as being legal...he can also get into trouble with the miltiary judicial system if he marries you and is still married to her..what are you thinking..if he does this to her do you not think he wont do it to you..he needs to grow up and get his things together..and she can demand half his retirement and get it if they were married ten years while his was on active duty..whether they were separated or not...
better hope he makes it back in one piece or you are fooked.
yep
betterr you continue with him.
both of you are in love with each other
ensure that your future is also safe.
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